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Happy Wednesday! I am doing my first link up with Kathy over at Vodka and Soda. I love this girl. You know all those internal thoughts you think on a daily basis? She lays them all out for you and literally has me spitting out my coffee every morning with her no filter posts. Check her out! I promise you will be hooked like I was. Her post yesterday about how blogging is like High School was pure gold. Plus she responds back to all your comments….I mean I’m just saying it’s nice to have manners right?
Alright y’all this is my first confession post and I must tell you or confess if you will right off the bat that I’ve been terribly scared of confession posts. I have really strange internal dialogue in my head every single minute of the day and plus I honestly feel like this for the 18 hours a day that I am not sleeping.
I sometimes don’t have the nicest internal thoughts and have a fear all my confessions would be about ranting and raving like how I secretly flash my lights at the slow drivers in the left lane on a daily basis…like you don’t want to know that about sweet ole me do you?
Let’s kick this off. I confess that I back my car in whenever I teach a a Barre class. At night when I leave it’s dark and I have this irrational thought that a bum is hiding behind my car so that when I back up I’ll hit them and A) be sued over it and B) it will be an excuse for this individual to try and rob me or steal my car/belongings/self. Did you read that email chain about people putting things on your back window…you stop to get out to take it off and they hijack you??? See problem solved…just back in your car.
Transitioning from this one….I confess I think someone is hiding under my car or on the side…I usually do a lap before I get it. I’ve also tried to wiggle underneath my car and I don’t fit…so unless this person is a small child I think I’m ok. ……Listen I told you I was weird. That movie Taken totally ruined me. I also don’t park next to white vans with those sketch slide doors….only takes 20 seconds to be lifted. It’s better to be paranoid then dead am I right?
I confess I find such simple joys in being able to phonetically sound out some of the lets call it “creative” spelling of names by some of my patients. Y’all it is not just the celebrities who are naming their children the oddest things. I’m living it everyday…the names….are different. I secretly give myself a pat on the back every time I pronounce one right.
I confess I sometimes speed up to block people from cuttting into my lane but then I curse at people when they don’t let me in.
I confess I feel really bad sometimes being a Florida blogger….like I don’t want to talk about anything weather related or the people from the North will come at me with pitchforks.
I confess when I was 12 years old I really wanted to be in a rap video…you know like that really pretty girl who does the slow walk through the party….I blame it all on the No Diggity Video.
I confess it took me an hour to find this picture! I guess Pitch Perfect sang this song or something?? It like monopolized my searching of “No Diggity Rap Video Girl Who Walks Through the Party in Slow Motion” searches. I finally just watched the video…..let’s stop for a quick second for a dance party shall we?
I confess I forgot sandals again after I taught Barre and I almost had to leave like this to go and pick up my new MacBook from the Apple store.
I confess that the above mentioned MacBook came out of the box and didn’t work….I may have told the poor Apple support guy I cannot believe they would send a computer that doesn’t work out and he said “ma’am we all make mistakes”…..I confess I word vomitted back “please don’t ma’am me and I’m taking a picture of the serial number they better not try to Jerry Rig it and give it back to me because I’ll know”. Yikes that wasn’t my proudest moment. I’m aggravated now I have to sit at the “Genius Bar” tomorrow don’t even get me started on the snarky comments I could make about the “geniuses” who sent out a busted computer.
I confess I’m eating chips, salsa and queso and drinking wine for dinner tonight with a girlfriend because Mark is at his place tonight. Such a balanced meal right???
If you see the two pack of queso at your local Costco get it….it was like crack….paired well with wine and chips.
I confess I am crushing so hard on this song right now. Every time it comes on in my car it is a straight up dance party….it’s like the above related No Diggity dance scene is happening in my car….it’s embarrassing for sure.
Alright I spilled some of my crazy town confessions what are yours? Can we will still be friends now after you read this? xoxooxoxo