The Time We Almost Got Shot with a BB Gun

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Okay so I think I’ve been really informative this week with hair care products, Target finds and fitness……so let’s do a fun post…..this post kind of reminds me about how I feel when I watch “Party Down South”… that is 30 minutes of my life I wish I could get back.  Just kidding I will try as always to entertain you.

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I wish I was joking

During the first year Mark and I were dating we traveled down to Ft. Lauderdale to his parents house for Thanksgiving.  It is one of Mark’s favorite holidays (Christmas is mine) so it really works out perfectly on the whole splitting the holidays with the family thing.  At the time I didn’t really ask questions about the logistics because little did I know Mark was piggybacking a softball tournament on the back end of this holiday.  So who got to watch 2 straight days of grown men playing softball for 10 hours at a time????

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I did actually have a fun time but this year I took my own car ;-)

Luckily I had my annual Board renewal to do so I had lots of time to take exam recertification questions.  Okay so onto the story.  In between some of the games we were having let’s call it a “picnic” on the grass in front of some of the cars of his teammates.  So let me first tell you this was in a great part of town…

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One of the girls that was there was like “oh no worries I think I just witnessed a drug deal go down over there….and there was a child involved”.
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So I hope I painted that scene well enough for you because here is where it gets good.  We are enjoying some adult libations having a few laughs when out of the corner of my eye I see this cruising at the top speed of 4 mph…
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With one questionable looking child in the driver seat….another shady looking character riding shotgun and I believe one of their little sisters pushing the convertible because naturally it was either A) STOLEN or B) Clearly nobody had time to charge it or C) They had been riding in that thing up and down the block so the 7 minutes of battery life was gone.
So as this all kinds of amazing internal dialogue comes cruising being pushed by us….one of Mark’s friends was laughing about a play earlier in the day.  The “driver” I believe he was 6 years old jumps out of the car and starts yelling at us.  Granted there are about 5 grown men, two women and a few kids sitting (the kid was clearly outnumbered).  His words (well I’ll put them how you can understand them)…”Hey what are you all laughing at???”  We immediately started looking at each other going is this little tyke stepping to all of us.  Next words out of his mouth I wish I was making this up “Aw yeah keep on laughing….I’m going to give yah something to laugh about”.
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He starts walking back to the “car” screaming at his entourage “y’all get my BB gun….it’s on I’m going to show them”.  I’m looking at Mark like what the is going on?  I’m thinking in my head “does that corvette even have like a functional trunk??? Where would he stash this gun???”
At this point everyone is shaking their heads in total bewilderment and as the grown men begin to stand up to “assess the situation” the instigator hops back in the driver side and tells the minion in the back “let’s go ride out and get it we will be back for these fools”.  As they are driving away all three of the “children” are straight up mean mugging us the whole way….I wish I could make this up.
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I hope you enjoyed my story.  One more day till the weekend!  Don’t forget about my giveaway!  Have a great day!  xoxoxo
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37 responses to “The Time We Almost Got Shot with a BB Gun”

  1. are you serious?! ugh, i swear kids these days have zero parenting.

    but for real, i would have laughed. i would have picked up that car of his and threw it across the lawn. take that you little shit!!

    -kathy | Vodka and Soda

  2. Where does one even begin with this story!? Kid’s have no respect at all…but at least so many funny gifs and pictures came to us via this post!!

  3. That is hilarious. Reminds me of that scene in bridesmaids when she keeps driving by her cop trying to look all gangsta in her beater!

  4. Tracey says:

    Are you kidding?! What a crazy story!!

  5. Joey says:

    Okay what the WHAT!?! This is the craziest. And the mean mugging (oh god Llama? I’m so bad at animals–don’t judge me) is maybe the funniest thing I’ve ever seen. I could picture the entire story!! “Get my BB gun!” LOL!

  6. hahah “lets go ride out” are you serious?!

  7. Kimberly says:

    Well this made me laugh to start my day :)

  8. This story reminds me of this:

    The 7 year old who stole his grandmothers car and just wants to do “hoodrat stuff” with his friends.

    Kids these days need help.

  9. Gina says:

    Oh…this is too much;) and that lama face… hysterical.

    XO, Gina

  10. Carly says:

    Those gifs were perfect! Tooo funny! Sadly, not much surprises me anymore when it comes to kids!

  11. Erin says:

    Seriously, where has your blog been all my life? You make me laugh everyday! That’s hysterical. And Hadley can’t stop looking at the llama….

  12. WOW! All I have to say is, where were these kids parents??!!

  13. OH MY GOSH, I’m sitting at my desk crying I’m laughing so hard. This is sad and hilarious at the same time! I’m glad you didn’t get shot…. Wow.

  14. Hahaha! I cannot believe that happened. So funny!!

    ~Ashley @ A Cute Angle

  15. I don’t even know what to say to this. Hahahahaha!!!

  16. Christina says:

    hahahah this is so great

  17. JumpingJE says:

    This is why children shouldn’t have access to violent video games. How terrifying!!

  18. ahhh what!!!!!!!!? that is crazy! well im glad you didnt get shot up ;0

  19. Rachel says:

    This is so funny…one of those stories where you say “you really can’t make this shit up…” Love it!

  20. hahaha WHAT?! this kid is insane!!

  21. JESUS CHRIST! What parents turns their kid into a little thug?! This little shit is the kind of psychopath that grows up to be a school shooter! And of course, the parents are probably sitting back and laughing. This is why people need to pass a test to have kids. And this is why I’m not having kids. They might end up in school with these little bastards.

  22. Jordan says:

    Hahahhaa WHAT. I have a really bad feeling about how that kid is going to end up when he gets older!!!

  23. Girl, you know you’re in the ghetto when the 6 year olds are packing heat! Hope you got outta there quick before he came back and did a push-by on ya! Bahahaha

  24. Stephanie says:

    hahahahaha I can’t even. I don’t even know what to say.

  25. OMG!!!! I am dying laughing! Seriously I would have laughed the whole time. Or stepped on the back of the car so they couldn’t drive away, see how tough they were when their hoopty car couldn’t drive away!

  26. Umm you had me at the title bahaha. Not as passionate about working out reading, but this got my attention!

  27. brooke lyn says:

    i love that your internal monologue went straight to…does that thing have a trunk? where would his bb gun even fit?! because rational thinking was a high priority at the time!

  28. Hahahaha I wish you could have captured this on film!

  29. I seriously just died laughing. Not even kidding. I’ve been having essentially the worst day ever and this just made it all better. I know I shouldn’t laugh but… Thank you Amanda!

    <3, Pamela

  30. how sad is it that this post doesn’t even shock me? Some parents really don’t get the parenting aspect of having children!

  31. Bahahahahah! What a fucking douche bag kid!

  32. Kenzie S says:

    That audacity of that child! I would have put him in time out. Disrespectful little shit!

  33. Elle Sees says:

    the scary thing is, he learned it from somewhere! and he thinks it’s perfectly acceptable. smh

  34. Priceless experience. This would happen to me. Only funny people have funny things happen to them. Consider yourself blessed. :) Or cursed… :)

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